That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
