I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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