Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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