do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
