With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
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