I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
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