addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
