Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
