Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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