dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
