Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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