i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Just pee around me
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize