so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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