Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We have started to decorate penises.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
