she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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