im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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