My first STD was from a foam party
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
