They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
