You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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