i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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