she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
