what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
is it fun? or sober?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
