After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
