Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
