So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Randomize