Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
