I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
