yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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