Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
