Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
