sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
