she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
