Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
