Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
