Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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