The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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