we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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