I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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