this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
