She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
