i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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