tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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