I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Bring me that man meat
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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