Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
