So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
