There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
