Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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