Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
