Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
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