We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
