did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
