big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize